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Youths On Mission Trip Help African Village, Forget To Plug Christ

By: Maxmilian Stolte BOLGATANGA, GHANA— After helping to provide clean water and food to impoverished villagers and build a school, a youth group of Texas missionaries from St. Joseph’s Church in Bryan, TX made the unforgivable mistake of going on their way without mentioning Jesus whatsoever. While their efforts and cultural influence will not be forgotten by the locals, the salvation of Jesus Christ will not be enjoyed by those who reaped the rewards of good deeds in His holy name. Taylor Robbins, 17, said she didn’t realize the error until they were at the airport. “I felt a great… … Keep Reading

Real Men Love Jesus, This Is Jesus

By: Devin Nevers There are countless ways to discern what makes a guy a real man. Metrics like bench pressing, muskiness, and ball size are some of the easiest ways to separate the authentic from the fraudulent. But even if a guy with gigantic testicles comes strutting into your home gym and pulls  200 pounds of resistance weight on your Bowflex, it’s still quite possible that he isn’t a REAL man. The only way to tell if a dude is the real deal for sure is if he loves Jesus. It’s just a fact, real men love Jesus. They’re just… … Keep Reading

Jesus Christ’s TOP TEN TUNEZ For The Coming Apocalypse

  By: Ross Childs ANYWHERE AND EVERYWHERE, USA — For millions of people on Earth, the first Sunday of April marks Easter, the celebration of The Resurrection of one Jesus Harriet Christ. This year, however, humanity is in for an Easter like no other as Christ himself returns to fight the Antichrist and his billion-strong demon horde for the ultimate smackdown: The Biblical Apocalypse. In preparation for the ACTUAL war to end all wars (Suck it, World War One), Jesus “Ready Savior One” Christ has given us the gift of badass tuneage on two stone tablets with built-in speakers. Here… … Keep Reading

7 Songs Jesus Might Have Walked Out Of Tomb To If They Came Out 2,000 Years Earlier

4/16/2017 By: Maximilian Stolte Today is Easter and almost 2,000 years ago Jesus woke up from the dead after a 3 day trip to the afterlife. While we don’t know for certain what his musical tastes were, let’s just go ahead and assume an entrance this grand would have been accompanied by an amazing song. While we’re at it, let’s imagine popular songs from today came out 2,000 years earlier and he could choose from any of them. 7. Jesus Walks- Kanye West This one should be obvious. Like a major league baseball player’s walk out song, this one has… … Keep Reading

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